Here's to new things

I was talking to a friend today who is having some financial difficulties and its difficult for me because I want to be able to help her but I'm just not in that position so I did the next best thing and I talked to my mom. Because this friend is the closest thing to a sister that I have, so I gave the help I can have her talk to mom and that's all I can do. I know it doesn't sound like it's much help but sometimes been able to set people up with help that is outside yourself is the best hope you can get.

But even though this made me very sad and down today it's not going to kill the fabulous things that are going on in my life. So my mother-in-law wanted to come see my husband and I for my  father in law and her's 50th anniversary. It is crazy to think that two people can stay together for 50 years in no way what I said they're perfect but they do work and they are still hurry get together they have their quirks but it's so reassuring to see that people can make that kind of a commitment.  No pressure or anything for me are just your mother-in-law coming to visit after you've only been married a month. But it was a great visit with her and my father in law. I think that her been able to see our home and everything was a relief for her because my husband is an only child, so her seeing that things are going well made her feel good. Also while they were here I had a job interview that just was fantastic and then today right after we drop them at the airport I got the call offering me the job! It's great now not only for myself do I feel fabulous about being able to have a job again it's only been a month but I feel really lost with out it in many ways, but I know it also makes my in-laws feel good to know that I'm not just taking from thier son. Not that my husband would care if I go back to work or not it really is for myself on this in many ways, I feel that I need that security within myself even though I depend on who bravely I feel like I still need to be able to stand on my own. As exciting as this is I have a lot of anxiety nervousness about it I will be training to be a Pilates instructor. I've done a lot of dancing and martial art, Pilates and yoga, but never as the instructor always as the student so even though these are things I'm very comfortable and good at doing things I'm good at, I'm very nervous about being able to pass my certification and being an instructor. I just want to be able to be good at it, well and to pass my certification practical test because those I do have to pay for so I do feel a great pressure with this. Even with good things it still gives me a lot of anxiety and worry but I know that it's the good kind and once I start training an doing it I know I will feel better, but that anxiety feelings not really going to be all the way gone until I completely pass my certification.