Two Schools, Two Policies: Developments in The Transgender Student Bathroom Battles

Two Schools, Two Policies: Developments in The Transgender Student Bathroom Battles



This upsets me so much, and it should upset and  outrage everyone who is against discrimination. With all of the horrible things that go on in this world all of the atrocities and all of the genocide why is it that we make an issue on how someone identifies themselves. They should be able to use whatever bathroom is the gender of what they identify with it if they live as a male they should be able to use the male restroom if they live as a female they should be able to use the female restroom.  Transgender's deserve the same dignity and rights as everyone else. By setting aside separate bathrooms for transgender's it is no different than going back to the black only and white only restrooms of the early 50s, we have come no further we have just found someone else to discriminate against and it is wrong .

Things are coming together

It's amazing how life can come in I full-serve go away. In no way will I ever be giving up costing mean my creative pursuits ever however I have always wanted to explore the opportunity of working in the instructor aspect of physical work. As a young child was heavily in tae kwon do until I had an injury, then from there I got into other physical things with horses and then later with dance Pilates and yoga, as I got more in to dance and Pilates I always wanted to become a Pilates instructor but I never had the spare money to do a Pilates certification. For people that don't know this can start at about $500 for a short-term and go up to 5000. So after I was married and moved I was looking for jobs I came across one where they're willing to pay for Pilates certification for the right person, guess what they called me I am so overjoyed I have an amazing feeling about this everything else in my life has been coming together how it should and I think that this is the other piece. So in a week I meet with them in person I've done a phone interview at this point and I feel that this is going to be it! It comes at a magnificent time for me I'm in the best physical shape I've ever been in my life my fibromyalgia is under control I'm emotionally happy, but this does still scare me this new process you know I will be doing certification and then testing. I talked to my mommy and she reassured me on it after all she was always the one to reassure me when I had belt testing and I never failed one I've always been able to do these things just not always had the Faith in myself but this time I really do. In his life is as soon as I got off the phone with the Pilates studio I got a phone call for another job that I applied for where the owner was very inconsiderate wanted me to drop everything and come meet with her now this minute, and I know that in the past I would've felt like I needed to jump on it because I'm not working right now. But because I'm not in that same struggle I get to follow my dreams and pursue my hopes and being mean and not suck it up and fit into someone else's box because I have to pay bills don't get me wrong I have bills to pay, but i'm not struggling at the moment and it's a great feeling. So for the moment I am going to put my excitement side as much as I can and work on my vintage wardrobe, after all happy sad heartbroken there all the best times to so creating always makes everything better!

Letting loved ones go

Sometimes in life you have to let people go , and cut them from your life. But you have to for self-preservation, no matter how much you love someone to watch the maze slowly kill themselves jags and lifestyle choices is the hardest thing to do you would think however. Cutting them out of your life I found is much harder thing to do. You never stop loving those people worrying about them caring about them and most of all missing the person that they were. As happy as an occasion as my wedding was it brought to light that I had to cut some people out. One of my oldest and dearest friends cross that line one too many times. You seem I have a very low tolerance for attics of any kind.  I made up my mind when I was very young and I wash my father so he kill himself with drugs and addictions of all kinds and the pavement it cost my family that no matter how much I love someone as long as they are an addict I will not be in their life. And in my life I found that I've had to cut people out people I love family and friends for different reasons, some are Adickes due to mental illness some Addicks do to a choice however they all know that they are Adickes. Unfortunately coming to this realization again has made me so sad, stolen  a lot of my happiness at a time that should be the most happy. But now it's time to stop to stop missing what was with people and start enjoying the blessed life I have. That may be the hardest part of everything as anyone that has lived with Adickes, with abusive people you find yourself waiting for that other shoe to drop and things are good feel like you're almost too good and you have to decide to stop waiting for things to go bad. To take hold of the good to demand it in this life to tell the enemy that it can't rule you that's the hardest part. People often think that addicts for themselves but what they do to others is far worse than what they do to themselves.

My wedding

So after almost four years together Michael and I decided we would get married instead of just move across the country together. So instead of just planning a move in a short time I started planning a wedding, however it wasn't just enough to have a wedding that was completely me my dress had to be me too and after all I knew that the white dress wasn't me. I love them don't get me wrong there are some beautiful dresses out there and having worked in a wedding dress shop I knew this I tried them on but they didn't speak to who I am and after all this is about joining two people are not some fictitious image of who we should be. So I decided that I would finish the ocean Langa that I have been working on as part of my line.so I started spending all of my time beading and crocheting, yes I had to incorporate everything back of it is crocheted the front is completely beaded. I dip dyed the fabric to be in the ocean blue colors then I dyed the yarn that I used to crochet as well the yarn that I used was yarn that I had for my grandmother stash still. Having grown up in California and going to the ocean at night and having it be the only place that I really feel that the most piece I had to make my dress that way too. So along with the colors of the ocean there are the legends of the ocean is well there are mermaids at the bottom and unicorns jumping out the mist, that if you look very closely there's also a diving helmet because after all I am the big nerd that I am in the legends in the books that I've read in my life I've heard of makes me who I am. My mother made my veil for me, following my overall vision which was great to be able to work with her on this something I will always having Cherish. However it wasn't just the veil that she did for me she help make me who I am after all but for the wedding she also helped me create my beautiful brooch bouquet. Now to do this it was a lot of fun and a lot of work to, we sorted through all of my grandmother's old pins some that I wear on a daily basis some that I don't and incorporated them all in to the bouquet. It's these things how can you feel them there with me even though none of my grandparents live to see the young woman that I've become and to known the man you have chosen for my life.

The wedding wasn't what I had planned, but that's life you have to go with it and as it came together the love of the family and friends that where able to be there showered over us and made it a wonderful day. Having grown up in a Disciples of Christ church, I wanted my wedding to start my life with my husband in a church. Not because I'm an extremely religious person, but because that basis help me become the spiritual person the transcendentalist that I am. So our service reflected that my husband grew up Roman Catholic, but it does not see himself as a practicing Catholic. So it didn't seem right to make it an overly religious ceremony,but for both of us a spiritual aspect is what grounds us. When planning the wedding I knew that I wanted to incorporate the paths that have shaped who I am. The biggest shaping came from the Hindu path, after it has been a part of me for as long as I can really remember when I was a small child I had a great family friend great Hindi family that live next-door to me and I spent a lot of time there when my brothers were in and out of hospitals for treatments it really shaped the person I have become. So with that I did find a beautiful Disciples of Christ church in Tempe right by ASU Michael's alma mater that was perfect beautiful alter made of driftwood, however as life will happen there were some complications that changed us from the sanctuary into the fellowship hall and as much as it changed everything it really did show the love of everyone. There's a beautiful euro that is as disciples of Christ as you can get similar to the ones found at the all peoples church in California or at the camp that I used to go to. So when we move into the fellowship hall we put that as our focal point used to table made an altar all of our guest pitched in, to set up chairs and if that wasn't enough are you musician and the other guys pitched in to move the piano that we would still have music. It was this outpouring of love that made this day when it should've been you see a wedding isn't about the space it's in or about the decorations the clothes it's about the love that's been joint and that's really what poured out in that room. There were some complications with my officiant the friend that had said he would do it some things had happened and he was unable to, unfortunately I didn't find this out until the day before the wedding but my mother's friend my friend Reverend Mary Louise Frenchman. After all this day truly was a better friend stepping up as well our musician was a good friend is a good friend of Michaels who came all the way from DC to not only be there but to play our music for us as well, and James Witherite truly did a wonderful job. Just like our friends that stepped in to do readings to video for us to take photos the outpouring of love was truly more than we could've asked for from anyone. 

 The photos above were all taken by our good friend Tammy Filandro, 

The readers for the ceremony where as follows in order Debbie Schilling (friend and mentor), Tim Creedon (husband to my maid of honor Cassie), Katie Iannucci ( goddaughter of Michael's ) she also so willingly stepped up to man my iPad to do my videoing.

 And as soon as I can figure out how to get the video uploaded YouTube keeps telling me it's too big I will have it on here but for now photos will have to do

Family heirlooms

I don't come from a family that could give me very much but I haven't heard some great things in the women in my family. And I find that as I unpack them to set up my home with my husband if they mean even more to me. Unpacking and putting out my grandmothers candy dishes, my great grandmothers table scarves that she embroidered and crocheted. I know that they are with proud of the young woman I've become and I love them all, and I know that their wisdom and the things that I've learned from them will be with me forever

Thought I lost it all

So I was taking some photos today and very dumbly using the same SD card that my friend Kerry used to take my wedding photos on, and what did I do. Some how I ended up deleting them all, and yes I be came a crying baby. I called my mom all upset and sadly what did my husband some home to a crying wife. Like most guys he sees this and has to fix what ever the issue is. So he got online and found a recover program and after we drove all over town looking for the cord to hook the camera up to the pc just to come home and find out that the SD adpter I had at home was all we needed. But after hours oh him working on it he was able to get them all back. 

Night before my wedding

It's a very strange feeling to be so happy and so sad at the same time. I'm so happy for my wedding tomorrow but I'm so sad to be leaving my mother. Now I know to a lot this may sound crazy but not only am I getting married so moving out but moving a cross the country as well. My mother is not just my mom she is one of my closest friends. We have been thur so much together from growing up with my brothers that have different issues but they both took a lot, to are g for my grandparents at the end of thier life's; or what came after. The past 4 years has be so much for starting ours over really with very little to her braking her hand ending up with CRPS then the cancer. However thur it all this going is the hardest thing of them all becuase its the one path we have to go on along for the most part.